I’m going to follow the advice of one of my most influential teachers, my wife, my partner, my friend, judy, and begin this derashah by telling you my Elul journey this year ...
It starts from sitting, year after year, and reading the haftarah[1] of shacharit[2] on Yom Kippur[3]. In it, the prophet Yishayahu[4] notes our fasting, our attention to the little, meaningless details of life ... and essentially says God doesn’t want any of that stuff. He tells that to us, to our faces, on the very day we fast and spend the whole day in synagogue praying to God for forgiveness.
Rabbi Creditor frequently mentions our beautiful windows[5] and how they really connect us with the world outside. On no other day is the outside anymore apparent. On no other day am I so keenly aware of the world outside ... and that i’m sitting here, doing nothing.
I want to start a new tradition, a kissei Yishayahu[6], akin to the kissei Eliyahu[7] that we have. But this chair is not a nice, handsome chair, waiting in anticipation for the prophet to join us. It’s an old, beat up chair. An empty chair. The prophet is long gone. I stare at that empty chair and the chair stares back asking me “what are you doing here?”.
There’s a joke, I’m sure most of you have heard it, about the man in his house. Police car comes by, officer says there’s a big storm coming, high water, it’s time to evacuate, jump in the car. The man, a man of faith, says “God will provide” and stays in his home. The waters are rising, a boat comes by, they say the waters are rising, jump in the boat. The man says “God will provide”. The waters are up to the roof, the man is standing on the very top, the helicopter hovers, drops a line. From a bull horn, they say “the waters are rising, it’s time to go, grab the rope”. The man says “God will provide”. The waters rise, the man dies. In heaven, before God, the man says “I believed in you, but where were you?” God says, “what do you want from me, I sent you a car, a boat, and a helicopter.” We laugh at this joke. I laugh at the man.
But I have a nightmare version of this joke. A man is in his house. There’s a big storm coming, high water. He’s there waiting. But there is no car, no boat, no helicopter. The man dies. In heaven, that man has a nice talk with some administrative angel while in the room next door, they drag me in before God. God, looking at a clipboard, asks me: a man was in his house, waiting for you. It says here you know how to drive a car pretty well. Where were you? It says here (tapping the clipboard) that way back in college, you took sailing lessons and you were pretty good. Where were you? Thinking, well at least I don’t know how to fly a helicopter, God says to me, you know how to work a bull horn, don’t you? the winch has a toggle switch, well within your capabilities, don’t you think? Where were you?
Last week, Charlene Stern so eloquently, so poignantly described how her parents, in the face of adversity chose life[8]. The key for me, the thing that touched me so, was that the life they chose was not just their own, but also of others, risking their lives to save others. It was all about community. All about helping others.
This past week, I thought, as we read the 7th of the 7 haftaroth of consolation, that something is wrong. These 7 haftaroth should be ones of rebuke, leading up to Yom Kippur. Something to kick us into action, into repentance, much like selichoth that Sephardim say every morning during the 40 days from the 2nd day of Elul until Yom Kippur. Judy says no, that we need the haftaroth of consolation, of love in order to have that safe place to do the work of repentance, and I’m inclined to accept her view. But also look at the bookends, the haftaroth we read just before Tisha Be’Av, Shabbath Chazon, and the one we read on Yom Kippur, and we see similar themes.
In the haftarah of Shabbath Chazon[9], Yishayahu relates Gods words, that God sees the people rebelling[10]. ( בנים גדלתי ורוממתי והם פשעו בי) . God says, what need have I of all your sacrifices[11] (למה לי רב זבחיכם) ... I have no desire in lambs and he-goats[12] (וכבשים ועתודים לא חפצתי). In fact, we even hear the echo of this shabbath: Hear the word of the Lord you chieftains of Sodom; give ear to our God’s instruction[13] (שמעו דבר יי קציני סדם האזינו תורת אלהינו עם עמרה).
The haftarah of Yom Kippur morning is even more pointed, more directed, more specific: “they ask me for the right way, they are eager for the nearness of God: “why when we fast, did you not see? When we starved our bodies, did you pay no heed? Because on your fast day, you see to your business and oppress all your laborers. Because you fast in strife and contention and you strike with a wicked fist. Your fasting today is not such as to make your voice heard on high. Is such the fast I desire a day for men to starve their bodies?”[14]
God goes on to say exactly what God wants ... that we “unlock fetters of wickedness, and untie the cords of the yoke, to let the oppressed go free, to break off every yoke. It is to share your bread with the hungry and to take the wretched poor into your home. When you see the naked, to clothe him/her and not to ignore your own kin.”[15]
For the past number of years, I’ve come to synagogue on Yom Kippur morning and read the haftarah of Yishayahu and wept, sitting feeling guilty. guilty for sitting here in relative comfort. Guilty for not being out there, outside, on the other side of our precious windows, doing more.
The guilt is even more complex. We are taught that Yom Kippur only atones of the sins between us and God. Read Yishiyahu. On this day of atonement, these sins which Yishiyahu, which God accuses us of seem but between ourselves. These are the sins of the nightmare version of the man and the flood.
One other teaching I want to bring in here is that of Rav Kook. Josh Gressel has been teaching a class on Rav Kook’s approach to teshuva[16], contrasting it to the formulaic approach of the Rambam[17]. In short, it pushes us to look to the future. What are we going to do differently? and not focus on the past. Looking at teshuva this way, I see the beating of our chests in the ashamnu and the al chet not as self flagellation for past wrongs ... but exhortation to do right!
So this year, here was my response. I had conversations with Zvi Bellin[18], whom, separate from me, had similar feelings. So we decided to follow Yishayahu and clothe the naked. To that end, we contacted various Jewish organizations in the area, asked them to put out boxes and barrels to collect clothes that we would take to the women’s day drop-in shelter.
When I started this derashah, I had meant to stop here. But I must tell you the rest of the story. My journey with the prophets ended not with Yishayahu.
A few weeks ago, it was my turn to do the runs to the institutions in the area, to pick up donations to take to the shelter. Zvi did the run the previous week and picked up boxes from a couple of places. We talked about it, he was away, I had a busy week. Maybe we’d let it go a week. Probably wouldn’t see much activity. I went to one of the institutions.
My arrogant self thought, I won’t get anything from that institution, who would bring stuff? I went in, told the receptionist who I was and what I was doing there, and she pointed me to a box. Boxes actually. And, oh yeah, another box or two behind the counter. Damn them, I thought, for ruining my self- righteousness with thoughtfulness, coming through. I went to another place. We’d already collected one big box full of stuff. Surely the one or two people in the entire organization that were going to donate anything had done their work, their mitzvah; and, much to my surprise, the box was full again. Oh yeah, the receptionist there had a bunch of stuff in her garage that she couldn’t bring because there wasn’t enough room. Again! the nerve of people stepping up!
I carried the stuff out to the car ... and cried. And then realized I was not channeling Yishayahu. I was channeling Yonah[19], the skeptic. The self righteous. The self absorbed.
So I was left, dumbstruck, crying ... I wish Yishayahu had that moment. He may not have. But Yonah did. And it scared him angry, which I can understand. Cause if it’s not that, all that’s left is to cry. There is so much to do, but we’re not alone. And people do respond when asked.
I also saw again, in that moment, that we are community. When we say the vidui[20], we say it in the plural. Much of selichoth[21] in the Sephardi tradition cannot be said in the absence of a minyan. While we can do this work individually, it is so much more powerful when we do it in community.
And the part where I stopped reading from the Yom Kippur hafatarah ... it continues what happens when we do this work ... “then shall your light burst through like the dawn, and your healing spring up quickly; your vindicator shall march before you, the presence of the Lord shall be your rear guard. Then, when you call, the Lord will answer. When you cry, he will say, here I am. If you banish the yoke from your midst, the menacing hand and evil speech, and you offer your compassion to the hungry and satisfy the famished creature, then shall your light shine in darkness, and your gloom shall be like noonday. The Lord will guide you always, he will slake your thirst in parched places and give strength to your bones . You shall be like a watered garden, like a spring whose waters do not fail.”[22]
Back to my joke, my story, my nightmare. And something I’ve been evolving to for a while. This thing about God and us. Yom Kippur is only about what’s happened between God and us. But there’s the paradox ..... or the answer. For this man waiting for a car, boat, helicopter, God doesn’t exist without us. Doesn’t function without us. We don’t become the watered garden unless it’s done together.
So I want to leave you with three blessings ...
First, I wish you all to be uncomfortable this Yom Kippur. And not a little uncomfortable. But also hopeful. That with each beating of our chest, we move towards doing more of God’s work in the world.
For the next, look into the faces of people around you. Look deep into their eyes, and see God at work. Moshe only got to see the back of God. You all have the privilege of seeing God’s face, smiling, working to make things good.
(I think Moshe made two mistakes. First, he gave up after seeing God’s back. Second, he looked for God in the wrong place. He was alone, high on a mountain. The place to find God is here, in the gan[23] next door, in the homeless shelter when we help to prepare meals.)
For the last, look into those same faces, those same eyes, realize that as you are looking deep into their eyes, and seeing God at work, that those eyes are staring at you, are seeing, admiring, loving the face of God in you.
At this time of year, the Sephardim say “ תזכה לשנים רבות טובות ונעימות muchos anyos. May you merit many years, full, good, and pleasant. ”
[1] Haftarah is the prophetic reading associated with the shabbath or holiday.
[2] Shacharit is the morning service.
[3] The haftarah for the morning service of Yom Kippur is Isaiah 57:14-58:14.
[4] Yishayhu is the Hebrew name for the prophet Isaiah.
[5] For those who have not been to Netivot Shalom, we have a beautiful sanctuary space with
large windows and lots of outside light.
[6] Literally, “chair of Isaiah”.
[7] Literally, “chair of Elijah” which is used during the brit milah (circumcision) ceremony.
[8] On the occasion of the 90th birthday of her father, Ben, Charlene gave a wonderful
derashah about, among other things, her parents’ decisions to stick around and help their
family and community in the face of adversity in Europe in the 1930s and 1940s. One thing I
noticed was that in almost every story, Ben could have chosen life and escaped the horror,
but instead chose to return home with food or money or whatever.
[9] The haftarah of Shabbath Chazon is Isaiah 1:1-27.
[10] Isaiah 1:2.
[11] Isaiah 1:11.
[12] Isaiah 1:11.
[13] Isaiah 1:10. The connection is that the word “give ear”,
האזינו,
is the first word from the torah reading for this shabbath.
[14] Isaiah 58:3-5
[15] Isaiah 58:6-7.
[16] Teshuva is repentence.
[17] Rambam is an acromnym for Maimonidies - Rabbi Moshe ben Maimon.
[18] Many thanks are due Zvi for thinking about this with me and doing much of the work
beside me, indeed leading me.
[19] Jonah, the other haftarah we read in the afternoon of Yom Kippur includes the book of
Jonah.
[20] The vidui, or confession, is a core part of the Yom Kippur liturgy. it includes the
“ashamnu” and the “al chet” prayers.
[21] The selichot prayers, or penitential prayers, that are said by the Sephardim from the
second day of Elul through the day before Yom Kippur and by the Ashkenazim from the
Saturday night before Rosh Hashanah. It is also a core part of the Yom Kippur liturgy.
[22] Isaiah 58:8-11
[23] A “gan” is a pre-school.